Sunday, July 3, 2011

Finding my inner child...

No, I promise this isn't a lengthy and boring monologue full of high sounding psychological mumbo-jumbo. I don't believe in that stuff. (Okay, it might be lengthy and boring... but I promise no psychology.) So what am I talking about? I'll get to the point... eventually. (Ha!) Lately, I've been doing some more formal photography for work. Which I am very thankful for! But in the process of doing this, something has caught me off guard. When I randomly walk through nature, camera in hand, I see all sorts of inspiration. When I am spending in afternoon with friends, and I happen to have brought my camera, I see endless opportunities to capture their familiar and much loved expressions. BUT get me behind the camera on a formal photo shoot? My brain goes dead. My creativity is flat. I quit having fun. Oh nooooo! Photography not fun?!? Say it ain't so! Well, something has to give. I have to figure this out!

Which brings me to my 'inner child' (Finally. Thanks for your patience.) For some reason lately I've been getting deja vu moments, flashbacks to my childhood. I don't know why. Maybe because I'm starting to look at the world through Iley's eyes. Whatever the reason, I have these moments. Moments: like when I hear the tune of the ice cream truck in my neighborhood. My toes tingle and I calculate whether I have the time to run in grab some money and make it back out before the truck goes by. Or how about the mundane task of making a deposit at the bank. When that vacuum tube thing shoots back, a little part of me still prays and hopes there's a sucker inside. (Darn it! It's never there. Should I ask?) Or my latest love? Fireflies! (Or Lightning Bugs... it's all good) Now that we are in the midwest again I have rediscovered Fireflies! Every night, after dark I have to watch the fireflies put on their show. I'm just sure they rehearse all day till the lights go down, waiting for their curtain call. How could I miss it? Little else brings me greater joy.

Oh sure, life is still full of all manner of seriousness and full-blown, responsible, grown-up stuff. And of course it's a whole other subject to stay fully awake and press on to spiritual maturity. (Another post, another time.) But amidst a climate in this old world of tax plans, scheduling, and insurance (yawn), I must make room for my inner child. That childlike part of the brain that stays open to simple and innocent pleasures. Always ready to discover new ones. The ability to freely imagine while still keeping one foot on solid ground. (Where's the other foot? I don't know. Pirouetting, apparently.) How can I do this? I must find a way. Not just for photography, but for all manner of things. To keep life from becoming a comatose chain of mundane nothings. Perhaps a little practice is in order. So if you see me in a field of fireflies, sucking on a popsicle, spinning till I'm dizzy. Please don't fear for my sanity. Just don't bother me... I'm living! :-)

(Thanks Tot!)